Last night.

Oh, last night.

We just can't quite seem to get a quiet moment around here.

But last night, I think it was about as loud as it gets. Earth shattering. Really.

I went to bed early. Really early. Like, before 8:00 early. (Still fighting this cold.) I read for quite a spell before finally closing my eyes, but I don't think I actually fell asleep until after 10:00. THEN, sometime around 10:45, directly above my head, I hear...

Click cllliiick. Click cllliiick. Click cllliiick.

Click cliiiick. 

Click cllliiick. Click cllliiick. Click cllliiick. Click cllliiick. Click cllliiick. Click cllliiick.

Vermin. In our ceiling tiles. Again.

AGAIN!

Yeah, I know, this has only been two times. But when there is some sort of rodent crawling around directly above your head while you are sleeping, two times is a'plenty.

I'm choosing to believe it was just a mouse. Because mice are fairly easy to catch. However, truth be told, it sounded larger than a mouse. And it seemed to have a limp.

Mr. Blue Eyes tried to convince me that it wasn't any sort of animal. To lie down and go back to sleep. But I can read between the lines when it comes to him. He might as well have just said, "I'm sleeping and I'm too tired to deal with this right now, and I want you to stay in bed with me, so I'm going to try to convince you it's not a rat with a peg leg."

But I know better.

I high-tailed it outta there and headed upstairs to sleep in the living room. I settled into the comfy recliner, and with this cold, it was almost better to be upright anyway.

I was sleeping quite peacefully when all of the sudden...

BOOM!

And I mean, seriously... BOOM!

The earth shook. The house shook. I went from quiet slumber to being wide awake.

Lightning must have struck somewhere here on the farm, or at least somewhere very close by. I can't explain how loud or powerful it was other than to increase my font size and use bold lettering. It was power that only God can produce, man. Only God.

Mr. Blue Eyes told me this morning that he sat straight up in bed. But somehow, and I have no idea how, our kids didn't make a peep.

They slept through the entire night.

And this morning, wonder of wonders, I awoke to this...

 My children... smiling... at me!

(These pictures were taken a few hours later, once we were all groomed and I had the good sense to take a few pictures of them, but you get the picture.)

We've been short on smiles and/or pleasant moods in general around here this sickly week, so when I saw Little Blue flash me his pearly whites, all I could think was, "Sweet Jesus, thank you. Thank you, thank you. Thank you."

A smile sure does go a long way.

I feel that maybe I just shouldn't write about this stuff anymore. That by writing about it, I am possibly just dwelling on the negative and making it worse in my mind. And if I don't write about it, and pretend it doesn't exist, it will just go away.

But I've been telling myself lately that it's important to be honest in my blog. Maybe I don't tell you all the most intimate and personal details of my life, but what I do share needs to at least be an honest representation.

So I'm going to tell you a bit about my day...

Five kids. Ranging from baby to preschoolers. They are good. They are sweet. Most days I love being at home here with them.

Even though I have to repeat myself eleven times about twenty-two different things.

Even though emotional meltdowns are always lurking behind the corner.

(Theirs, not mine.)

(Which is debatable at this point, but usually it's theirs.)

But today...

My couch has been puked on (the gross side effect of a child with a cough) three times and peed on once.

I was peed on once.

One of the little men missed the toilet and peed on the bathroom floor a bit.

And one of the little women pooped in her crib at naptime.

And none of us are feeling all that well yet.

And here's the best one... When I casually mentioned to Mr. Blue Eyes that our sweet puppy, Elsa, has been wandering over to the other side of the road for some reason, he informed me that's where he's been dumping the cat litter.

Oh, yummy...

The puppy that insists on putting her mouth on you everytime you walk out the door has been eating cat poop.

There's a pleasant little revelation for ya'.

Well, every single little one is asleep at the moment, so I'm off to clean up the house, spray down every last thing with Clorox Anywhere, take my vitamins, and hide in the corner while sucking my thumb and daydreaming about becoming a perfume saleswoman.

Not necessarily in that order.

I am happy to report that Marley & Me came through with a good cry, as I'd hoped.

I just love that movie.

I am unhappy to report that it didn't solve all my problems.

(Or if you read yesterday's post, it's probably more accurate to say my 'non-problems'.)

I still feel like a turd in a bucket, but today I did get a little help from my friends...

Uno) A long chat with Marigold. Sometimes I think she and her sister are the only ones who can convince me I'm not a crazy, hormonal mess. Or that we're all equally crazy, hormonally messy. And either way, it always helps my mood by leaps and bounds to know I'm not alone in this world of young motherhood.

2) Mr. Blue Eyes stayed home today to help me out with the kids and lighten my workload. Sometimes when he doesn't know what to say to perk me up, he does know that simply his presence is a comfort. Once again, I'm reminded I'm not alone.

(Alone... Alone... Anyone sensing a pattern here? Could I be... oh I don't know... lonely? In need of some adult companionship?)

Thirdly) I ran across some pictures this evening of my babies when they were actually much more baby-ish. Since they had emotional meltdowns left and right all day today and we put them in bed by 7:00 because they were just so unbearable, seeing pictures of them, when they were so much more vulnerable and innocent, gave me a little surge of motherly love. I know that they're still vulnerable and innocent, but when they've reached the age where they can fill an entire day (or several days) with sass-talk and whining, it becomes increasingly harder to remember that fact.

So, you wanna see? You wanna see some pictures of chubby baby chub?

Hold onto your hormones, ladies...

Awwwww... Look at that toe head. Those blue eyes. Those angelic chubby cheeks! Cheek chub is quite possibly one of the best kinds of chub.

And now for the real baby baby shot...

I TOLD you to hold onto your hormones.

I know.

Pink.

Glossy little pucker.

Sleeping baby girl.

It's NOT enough to erase my frazzled nerves at the last few stressful weeks, but almost.

Almost. 

It helps.

In Marigold's infinite wisdom, I think the thing that might be enough to give me some relief, enough to put me back in the land of being a sane, patient mother, is a little something called...

Sleep.

Which is exactly where I'm headed right this second.

I find a lot of inspiration and sisterhood here in the blogosphere. As a stay-at-home mom / daycare provider, there are some days when the web is the only place I find any adult interaction. It's just good to know that someone is out there, especially when so many bloggers are moms like me. And we share the little truths of our lives with one another, and we realize we're not alone in our daily grind.

SO, today I'm here to share a little truth. A little reality. A little taste of what's going on with me.

I'm so stinkin' tired.

The kids have been sick for five days, and now I'm sick. We've spent the day resting, but we're all so miserable, none of us can really relax. Our schedule has been much more busy and overwhelming lately, and it has finally gotten the better of me. I'm officially in burn-out mode.

Do you ever find yourself in burn-out mode?

Please tell me you've experienced burn-out mode.

It will make me feel better. It will reenforce the idea of 'sisterhood' I speak so highly of.

I know that it is, in fact, burn-out mode, for several reasons...

1. Nothing is wrong, other than being sick. My relationships are good. No one is rocking my boat. Our sources of income are steady. There isn't anything undesireable looming on the horizon.
2. Nothing makes me happy. I'm pretty much disinterested in everything around me. I've got no pep.
3. Even the most menial tasks make my brain hurt.
4. I'm sick of everyone, everything, and myself.

Okay, now that I'm writing it down, I realized that this is probably a combination of burn-out mode AND foggy-sick-person-brain. I just keep telling myself, since nothing is actually wrong, that I will perk up once I get over this cold. And I tell myself not to overthink it too much, and not to look for problems where there aren't any.

The only thing going on around here is burn-out-foggy-sick-person-brain.

So here I sit, thinking, "Dear children, please keep sleeping," and, "Dear husband, please come home soon," and watching Marley & Me. Because I feel that maybe I just need to induce a good cry to get it out of my system, and since nothing in my life is actually wrong, I must resort to Marley & Me.

And now is the part where Jen has a miscarriage and Marley comes over and puts his head in her lap.

Oh yeah, tears. Here we go.

Shoot, I got nothin'. And now the movie is back to being funny again. I guess I'll have to ride it out till the end.

If this doesn't work, I may have to bring out the big guns...

P.S. I Love You.

I'll let you know how it turns out.

It's funny how one picture of a yellow pear tomato can tie in so many ideas for me this morning. Let me just tell you... If you're a blogger, and you can't think of anything to write about, just go look through your pictures and one of them will speak to you.

A couple of things on my mind this morning, all in regard to the idea of 'worth waiting for'...

1) This happy little tomato. I think it may be my favorite thing produced by the garden so far. Yellow pear tomatoes are my favorite of all the tomatoes. Perhaps even of all the vegetables. They're such a special treat. And as I may have mentioned, we put a lot of work into our garden this year, so the reward is that much sweeter.

2) My babies and some down time. My babies are sick today. (I don't usually call them my 'babies' anymore, but rather my 'kids'. But when they're sick, they're my 'babies' once again.) Actually they've been sick for over four days now with raspy voices and coughs and fevers. I came down with it yesterday, although I don't think I have it as badly as they do. Between the sickness and a crazy schedule for the last two weeks and right through the weekend, we needed some down time. So this morning I called my daycare kiddos' parents and had them stay home today. My babies need some rest so they can get better. And frankly, so do I.

3) Twelve years ago tonight, Mr. Blue Eyes and I had our very first date. (For a little run-down on how we met and got together, click here. Except don't. Because I find it very embarassing now. But do. Because it was the beginning of something wonderful. But don't. But do. Just don't tell me that you did, and I can continue pretending that no one has read it, ever.) So here we are, twelve years down the road, and we've spent the past 3.75 out of 4 nights sleeping  in separate beds, because we've been sleeping with the babies while they are sick. Even though he is much larger and sometimes he scratches me with his toenails, I'm realizing he is still my preferred sleeping partner over the kids. He's much more snuggly and has never once kicked me in the head, which is more than I can say for Miss Peaches at this point.

What about y'all? What are you enjoying today that was worth waiting for? Or what are you currently waiting for down the line?